Condemn the Short Shorts: Reclaim Our Decorum

Untitled drawingI strongly believe that we should live and let live. But here is my exception to the rule. I am sorry but for this one particular situation, I cannot let live. Not when the lives of my unborn children are being corrupted even before they are conceived. Scratch that, lo….o…ng before they are conceived.
I am sickened by the thought of little girls happily flaunting their tiny backsides in the name of fashion. And even worse by fully grown women, you know, showcasing their fundamendos, as a Kenyan would say. As a disclaimer if your shorts completely cover your butt, then I’m not referring to those, it’s the shorts that reveal areas that are best covered up that I have a vendetta against.
Who is this person that started the trend? ..and for Christ’s sake, why?
Maybe my conservative background has something to do with my strong disgust for this particular trend, but maybe not. I happen to be very open-minded. I love the fact that fashion is daring but we have to keep in mind that the point of wearing clothes to begin with is to cover our nakedness, otherwise what is the point? Why would anyone spend their hard earned money for a piece of garment that’s completely useless? A miniscule piece of fabric that leaves nothing to the imagination.
These shorts are so incredibly teensy that they might as well not be there. I saw a pair so short that the butt cheeks were all out for the world to see. Then again that might be the point of the short shorts (somberly smh-ing). I think these shorts are completely disrespectful to women, all women. The ones who wear them and those stuck in the same vicinity as the wearer. I can see why a perverted man (or woman) may want a woman to wear them but why the wearer actually pulls them on, I just don’t understand it. Unless the buyer is led to believe that short shorts are a comfier version of essentials. If this is why you own a pair, you’re excused buddy but please refrain from wearing them unless you do in fact, as an undergarment. Why would anyone want to walk around in a pair of shorts that shares the same length with your panties? And just what is the point? You might as well wear your intimates and walk, after all they are the same length and a lot of the times made from very similar fabric. I in fact, suspect that in order to wear them “right”, your bloomers (ha ha British people, you’re awesome!) get thrown out the window.
I’ve made a lot of noise about this fad. I hate it. It’s so unbelievable to me that this trend made it into the market place and then worse, to the homes of consumers. Do we want to be like celebrities (some, not all. There’s a good lot of respectable celebs out there) so much that we have no self-respect for ourselves? And for those around us? Yes, those around us, because how you dress affects me too. It puts certain thoughts into my mind. Provokes thought! Don’t invade my pure totally non-judgemental mind with your nakedness. It’s rude, it’s unacceptable. Short shorts, are not clothes, they’re undergarments and they should be left as such (better yet, not produced). I refuse to believe that any girl or woman so much desires the sexual attentions of random street men (again or women) that these skimpy teeny-weeny shorts are the answer they’ve been waiting for. I’m saying no! The short shorts should not be a commodity for sale.
I know that my very aggressive rant has been particularly convincing and I’m sure that as we speak you are tossing out that pair you just bought (accidentally, of course). But I still took the liberty of going further to point out two very strong reasons why I am so opposed to this so called trend!

They’re a Health Hazard

No, this is real. Imagine you’re heading off to work (we should probably go with hangout as I hope any employer would send you home in that thing- unless you’re in retail and you’re selling the short shorts, in which case I have no words for you) and you’re using public transportation. You don’t know what that seat has been through -and this is putting it very lightly (my geeky scientist bff can provide swab details here if needed). The germs that may be, in fact are, on that seat, are extremely gross. And there you are strutting in with your butt cheeks hanging out, possibly without panties -oh goodness, the image!-and plop onto the seat. The most delicate part of your body is now in obscenely close proximity with all manner of bacteria. I’ll leave the rest to your imagination. But really ladies, protect yourselves-and your parts.

They Attract The Wrong Crowd

I’m sure that we’ve all heard at one point or another that a woman who dresses scantily only attracts the wrong kind of attention. I can almost hear you saying that wrong is relative. And yes, wrong may be relative. But still, we only attract the kind of people that we are. James Allen so aptly said “We do not attract what we want, but who we are“. So the question is, who are you?

They’re demoralizing to women

It’s because of skimpy garments like the short shorts, particular through music videos, that women may be regarded as sexual objects. Over the years women have worked so hard to gain a reputation and be respected by our male counterparts. This “fashion trend” takes us back so many years. It’s unfortunate.

So my plea to you this evening is this: Respect and protect yourself!

2 thoughts on “Condemn the Short Shorts: Reclaim Our Decorum”

  1. Yes! yes! yes! BURN THEM! DEATH TO BUM SHORTS!!!
    Remember ladies and gents,
    Dress how you want to be addressed. C’mon!! BURN IT or TAKE IT BACK!
    I hope this madness does not continue next summer.

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