So most of 2020 is behind us now yet there is a part of me that is still waiting for things to normalize so I can actually begin the year. It has been a confusing time coupled with a higher level of anxiety. That is how I am feeling.
I have gone through stretches of staying home to periods of going into work and in both settings I have been uneasy. Staying home gets monotonous and occasionally lonely. Then the idea of leaving home after being safely cocooned from potential exposure to covid creates further anxiety. There is a bit of relief in getting some fresh air and getting dressed to go into work. And then worry over being in closer (social distanced, of course) contact with coworkers whose movements and choices I have no control over. Like I said, these has been a confusing time for me.
I hope that your experience is less jumbled than mine seems to be. Or if it is like mine or more complicated, I hope you have an outlet to help keep you sane and calm. I would like to know what your days are like and how you are feeling.
Sending you much love and well wishes as we continue to navigate a rather unusual way of being.
The past couple of weeks I haven’t written anything because burnout. I am working two jobs, day and night. So yeah. But I doubt you’re interested in hearing all about that. That’s my problem, not yours. Here goes a little something…
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Many years ago there lived a girl in a small little neighbourhood in Nairobi, the capital City of Kenya. We will call her Trish.
Trish was a lovely happy little girl. At the time she must have been about nine or ten years old. She longed to play with her friends after school although her mother was quick to reprimand her for roaming about the neighbourhood. Continue reading “Mothers Are a Gift”
The other day I was talking to one of my closest friends, I call him my voice of reason. I was ranting, actually. I was not happy about how some things turned out. I was also afraid of what was going to happen. I told him that I had a potential solution to the problem. When he asked me why I thought my solution would help I said that I kept feeling like my current situation was contributing to the issue. He then said three very simple words to me.
I have lived in Winnipeg for eight years now. The one thing that I hear people say literally every single day is how this place sucks. If we are being completely honest, I too have said that on several occasions. Many times, in fact.
Winnipeg is small. I find that most people live in their little cocoons connecting with only the people they’ve known all their lives. I am guilty of that too. I mostly stick with my family, and friends that I met when I first arrived.
But when I go out to explore different events and interact with people outside of my usual circle, I find that Winnipeg has so much to offer. I have decided that the reason why a lot of us complain about this cute little town we live in is because we don’t give it a chance. And we definitely don’t go out to explore it.
Lucky for y’all I connected with an amazing photographer @gyk26 who is bringing Winnipeg right to your screen. The Peg is beautiful and it is full of life. Enjoy these incredible photos today. Tomorrow, step out and explore for yourself -after all the winter is behind us.
Also tell us about your favourite spots at the Peg in the comments section.
For the past little while money has been on my mind. I want this year to be the year that I focus on saving, growing my emergency fund, completely getting rid of debt and investing more than I ever have before. So far its going really well. The other day I was reading up and learning about credit card debt and stumbled about a very simple detail that got me super excited.
In Saskatchewan, last Friday, a tragic accident occurred that led to the loss of 15 lives. There were 28 passengers on the bus. The crash involved the bus carrying the Humboldt Broncos and a semi-trailer.
Deliberate dating is a concept that cannot be emphasized enough. Finding an ideal life partner is a pretty big deal. When committing to another person we tie our lives to theirs. We need to become deliberate about who we date.
I strongly feel that it is important to be very deliberate about the value we place on ourselves as women in the dating market. And of course as a result, who we allow to woo us.
Our society looks at dating as this fun dance where we make each other happy. We buy into the idea of fate, destiny and happily ever after. We think that if we can finish each other’s sentences and laugh at each other’s jokes then we were made for each other.
Movies and books have persuaded us that there is a special person made just for us. We are convinced that when we eventually meet this special person, everything will fall into place.
But when we look at divorce rates the numbers are staggering. An article by Jayne Embree, a divorce coach, says that an average marriage in Canada lasts 13.7 years. Global news published an article on January 2016 that indicates that Canada’s divorce rate is 48% .
According to The Statistics Portal, the average length of a marriage is 8 years in the U.S.A. The rate of divorce however, has not increased since the 1980s.
These divorce statistics only account for first marriages. With the inclusion of second and third marriages (or more for those really brave souls), these percentages would be much higher. Research suggests that subsequent marriages are more likely to end in divorce .
people criticize me for being picky about who i date. i date for marriage, divorce isn't an option, loyalty is a must and my significant other will be who my kids model after
This article is not meant to terrify, but to bring awareness.
Deliberate dating is carefully evaluating the assets possessed by that potential someone. What is he bringing into the relationship? Will that union better you or pull you back?
People walk into marriage with the intention of staying married. But based on the divorce rates above, far too many find themselves divorcing. I strongly feel that to increase our chances of having successful relationships, we need to start deliberate dating.
A woman needs to embrace her value as she interacts with her love interests. She needs to keep in mind the attributes she has developed over time. Things such as beauty and the efforts put into it, educational qualifications, careers built, social status and so on, increase her value on the dating market. These are assets that she brings to the table.
An ideal partner would be someone with all those gushy qualities like (handsome, funny etc) and similar assets in education, career and so on.
Marriage is a partnership, kind of like a business. When signing a business contract, one looks at the individual’s track record, their ability to get the job done, their profitability and the list goes on. One deliberately selects a business partner who shows promise of success. In the same way when dating, one needs to deliberately select a significant other who will bring value to the relationship.
REALLY evaluate the men you would like to date. Do they see your value? Can they match it? There is no point of working so hard to further ourselves only to be dragged down. Don’t settle for less than you are worth.
Know your value and aim higher.
If you have been following my blog you know I recently went on a vacation to the Leopard Beach Resort in South Coast Kenya. It is one of the best resorts in Africa having been awarded the Africa’s Leading Spa Resort in 2013, 2014 and 2016 and Africa’s Leading Family Resort in 2016 and 2017 among other awards. It was an amazing experience.
There is a couple on my flight that just saddens my soul. The man is at least three times her senior. Why a young lady of nothing over the age of twenty-three would be dating an old white man, possibly in his sixties, is completely beyond me.
The moment one sets foot into Ice Castles Winnipeg all thoughts about the deep freeze that is our city vanish from the mind. The tunnels, slides, caves, lights, music… are such a delight. It is the perfect place to take new Instagram pictures. Trust me, I know. I may have taken ahem, ‘a few’ photos. Continue reading “Ice Castles Winnipeg”
2017 was a pretty rough year for me. Yet during all my struggles and my pains I learnt so much. I am stronger and wiser for it now. These eight lessons from 2017 may seem basic but when you are so caught up in things that at the time seem so important and are all-consuming, you fail to see the full picture.
Looking back now, I am glad I went through everything that I did last year because the changes (for the better) I am making now are a direct result of my mistakes and my poor judgement in the past.
Alright, here are my eight lessons from 2017:
Be sure that in all relationships, there is more smiling than there is frowning.
There’s a girl, a young woman, sitting at the far corner of the grandiose dinning hall. Leaning on the wall, at the very end of the room.
Sandi, that is her name.
She is slender, dark, with big white eyes. She is not starring at a cellphone, or a computer screen. She’s not reading a book or eating or even fidgeting with anything. She is, literally, just sitting there. Continue reading “A Tale: The Enigma of the Good Wife”
“I was at a wedding yesterday and it left me feeling a bit sad.” She told me. In her voice I could hear the strain of a person forcing back tears. Her cheeks had started to turn rosy. Her eyes were water. She did not shed a tear.
I was caught by surprise.
That was not how her sentence was supposed to end. Continue reading “I Missed All the Signs”
I’m standing right in front of a speeding train. As it swiftly zooms away I briefly catch a glimpse of the passengers through the windows. Some are talking, others laughing or sleeping while others seem to be far away in thought. At the train station, some travelers are walking in all directions, others yelling their goodbyes while waving hysterically at the departing train. Noises of sadness and joy can be heard from all around me. Some travelers are hugging and crying, saying their goodbyes. Others are finally reuniting. I see a couple dashing towards each other with laughter and tears in their eyes. Two older ladies seem to be sharing a year long hug. Business travelers are hastily walking to meetings. At the corner against the wall a rugged man is playing “Redemption Song” on his guitar and singing at the top of his voice. His guitar case is wide open on the floor by his feet. In my mind’s eye, the year replays itself.
At 9PM yesterday I was finally done for the day. It had been an extremely long day for me. I desperately wanted, more than anything in the world, to get into bed and float away to blissful dreamland. I had been up for nearly two days. Well, with perhaps an hour of sleep here, another hour there, but mostly awake, working and studying. My assignment was submitted, my test was done and work was long over, finally a light at the end of the tunnel. I grabbed my expensive Ivanka purse (ahem! the Jang’o in me-Jang’o is my tribe that Kenyan’s believe to be very self-absorbed and shallow, which I might be, to some extent) and headed for the door, almost at the speed of light. Who knows how long that door would remain open? As far as I know University of Winnipeg has never locked students in the building against their will, but I wasn’t taking any chances. I had a date with my bed and nothing was getting in the way of that. With the hugest smile a sleep deprived bloodshot eyed human could manage, I pushed against the door freeing myself for the journey home.
The sudden gush Continue reading “Hey Winterpeg! How Can We Embrace this Winter?”
I just have one question for the guys. How is it that none of you is walking around barefoot? You all seem to wear shoes. And very good looking shoes at that. How? Last night I spent hours on end going through web pages after pages hunting down good winter boots for men! Do you actually but shoes in the price of the hundreds? How can you afford that? So you buy a pair of boots that costs you say $200 ok? Tell me, please tell what then do you eat for the next two week? Why are men’s shoes so expensive?